Friday, July 21, 2006

This Is, Uh, Sort Of, Uh, A Blog

Newsflash: In order to be considered a worthy member of the 'art' elite, you must use the term "sort of" whenever describing your work. You must also preface every "sort of" with an "uh" or "umm" (this denotes your expertise in the field of expression). It also helps to attach "esque" at the end of the artist or paradigm to which your work is "sort of" related to. One may also interject "kind of", but only after a "sort of". To convey the ultimate impression of one's superior eye for art and the critical review of your own or someone else's work, a combination of the two should be used in the same sentence, but only if there is an "uh", or "umm" acting as a buffer between "sort of" and "kind of".

If this 'Newsflash' doesn't resonate with you, it's because you haven't subjected yourself to enough actor/director interviews, or listened to enough director commentaries. Seriously, take the OJO challenge- the next time you listen to an actor or director interview, or watch a DVD director commentary, and that actor or director can go an entire 10 minutes without using the terms previously mentioned then I'll give you double the money you just spent reading this post.


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